How To Write A High Performing Facebook Ad


If there’s one simple mantra that can be applied to any form of written promotion for your business it’s this…

Write like you speak!

As my confidence and experience grows as a copywriter, the better I am at doing this. The more I can remove the “marketing speak” or “sales speak” language and replace it with conversational language.

The more I replace “sales speak” language with conversational language, the better my results.

What do I mean by conversational language?

I imagine that I'm sat in a coffee shop and a couple sits at the table next to me. I overhear their conversation. They are complaining about the exact problem that I can solve for them quickly and easily.


What would you do?

Would you interrupt their conversation to tell them how you can help them?


Would you return to your coffee and newspaper for fear of a complete stranger saying who are you and why should I listen to anything that you have to say?

Seriously, what would you do?

Imagine, you are having a great day. All the lights are turning green for you. So, would you ask Lady Luck to sprinkle some more magic fairy dust on your conversation?

Or would you shy away from talking directly with the person that needs your help the most?

There’s no right or wrong answer. Just be honest with yourself about what you would do in this situation.

The fear, the excitement, the anticipation of what you would say… that’s the emotional state that I put myself in before I write any promotional copy.

You see, every message that you send is an interruption in your prospects day. So, what you are going to say better be worth their time.

If you are writing a Facebook Ad, then you are sending your message to people who don’t know you. This is the same as interrupting the conversation of the couple sitting next to you in the coffee shop. The only difference is you can’t see them.

You are still invading a stranger’s day because you know you can help them solve a top of mind problem.


You’ve got to write something that makes your prospect say to themselves Wow, tell me more.

Once you’ve grabbed your prospects attention and imagination in this way, you have permission to tell the whole story. You’ve got permission to make your case. To give them a front row seat to a better life and ultimately to make them excited to take the next step.

How do you do all that in a Facebook ad?

That’s what this blog post will show you.


The 2 Headlines Of A Facebook Ad

The first thing your Facebook ad must do is stop the scroll.

How do you do that?

With an interesting picture and a compelling headline.

If your picture screams THIS IS AN AD, then many people are likely to scroll right past it without reading your headline.

If your picture looks like something one of your friends would post then it’s likely to stop the scroll.

What types of pictures do your friends and family post most often?

Pictures of them on holiday. Pictures of them in a restaurant or in a museum. Pictures of them doing cool things.

So, what types of pictures should you use to stop the scroll?


If you are sharing information, then put a picture of yourself looking directly at the viewer.

If you've got an interesting holiday picture of yourself, then use that if it relates to your headline.

The picture that I am using a lot right now is a holiday snap. Why? Because the headline is The Truth About Building A Dream Business.



For me, part of building a dream business is being able to work anywhere in the world. Which is why I think this image works so well.

So, the picture and the headline work together. The picture slows the scroll, and the headline below the picture tells the reader if this is worth their time.


The Dangers Of Click-Bait Headlines

You don’t want to make your headline too sensationalist. You don’t want to make your headline Click Bait.


Because you want people to read your ad… before… they click the link to go through to your landing page.

If your prospect reads your ad copy, then they have an emotional connection with your offer. They know why they should trust you, and how you can help them, so they are much more likely to take the next step.

If they click through to your landing page after reading only your headline, then they likely to bounce off your landing page if your offer requires even the tiniest amount of commitment.

For example, if you are offering them a free ebook and all they have to do is enter their name and email address to get it, then you are likely to struggle to get good results if they don’t know who you are, why they should trust you and how you can help them – all things that are in your ad copy.

If you are giving away a discount coupon for something your prospect will immediately understand, such as a Car Wash, or Tanning Session, then you can get good lead generation results without story driven copy because of the strength of your offer.

If you are trying to generate leads with any form of information based marketing (such as a book or video series), then you need to explain to your prospect why they should trust you before they arrive at your landing page. If you fail to do this, then your lead generations results are likely to be poor and very expensive.

So, how do you write a headline that stops the scroll without making your prospect immediately click the Learn More button?

You go back to the coffee shop situation. Imagine yourself saying to the couple on the next table…

Excuse me, I couldn’t help overhearing and if you are struggling with X, then I’d love to tell you about…

You’d love to tell them about how they can solve their immediate problem… and… how you discovered this amazing system.

So, write the benefit to them (what’s in it for them if they give you 5 minutes of their time and attention) in a conversational way.

Then write the benefit to them in 10 different conversational ways.

You see, the truth about writing a good headline is that you need to write at least 10 of them to find something that works.

How do you write a great headline?

You write between 30 and 50 headlines and pick one.

When you do the work, you’ll find a great headline. You’ll also have several testing options.

That’s the first headline of a high performing Facebook Ad.


What’s the second headline?

The second headline of a high performing Facebook ad is the body copy before the See More button.



What you say in the first 4 lines determines the number of people that read your ad.

Those first 4 lines are critically important to the success of your Facebook ad.

I’ve written Facebook ad copy that’s over 1,000 words. I’ve then tested the second headline to see what performs best.

Here are the 2 different versions in a recent test:


Version 1

If I’ve learned anything from the bankruptcy of my first business, and starting a 7-year journey of discovery that ended when I made £672,989 in just 9 days… it’s that Word Of Mouth, Networking, and knowing the “right people” has very little to do with building a dream business.

It’s actually something far more powerful, and I didn’t see it at first.


Version 2

Anyone can start a business!

But only certain people can create one that is PROFITABLE 💰

What sets the two apart?

Knowing how to find people that need your help and turn them into happy paying customers!

It took me 7-years to discover how to do that!


Which version performed better?

Version 1 performed almost 60% better!

The number of people that clicked the See More button was 6.64% in contract with Version 2 which was 2.93%.

Would I have predicted that?


That’s why I ran the split test.

I'm always looking for ways to improve the performance of my ads, and the 2 headlines will give you the biggest performance improvement.


Tell An Interesting Story

Once you’ve written your 2 headlines… what else do you need to write?

The body copy. But…

What makes body copy inspire the reader to take the next step?

An inspirational personal story!


Let’s return to the coffee shop. Imagine, you’ve interrupted the couple sitting next to you. You’ve said something that’s so compelling that they have said wow, tell me more.

What do you have to say to them, to motivate them to take the next step?

You need to answer all the questions that are on their mind. Questions like:

  1. Who are you
  2. Why should I trust you
  3. How did you create your system or product
  4. What will your system or product do for me
  5. What do I have to do to get your system or product


There’s no better way to answer all these questions than with an inspirational personal story.

A story that explains why you were looking to make a change in your life, what result you wanted to achieve, what challenges you faced on your journey, what made you keep going despite all the setbacks, and what results you have achieved with your system.

If you'd like a more detailed explanation of how to tell an inspirational personal story then please read this blog post: 5 Simple Steps To Tell A Thrilling Tale

My 5-step system to tell an inspirational personal story is based on the formula that Hollywood screenwriters use. I've simplified their formula to make it easier to tell a personal story that has the audience sat on the edge of their seats.

In my experience, an inspirational personal story is the best way to earn trust and inspire your audience to take the next step. This is true for lead generation, and it is true for making the sale.

What makes a story inspirational is how you overcame the challenges that you faced on your journey.

If you get an idea and make a million pounds the first time you try it, then there’s not much of a story there. There is nothing to inspire your audience.

What is inspiring is achieving the result you set out to, despite the setbacks that you faced along the way.

So tell your story honestly. Share the setbacks that you faced along the way. Tell the reader why you didn’t quit despite the setbacks.

That takes courage. That takes honesty. That inspires people to changes their lives. That is the key to building your business.


That’s not the only type of Facebook ad you could write.

What other high performing ad formula can you use?


Busting Myths

We all want to know the secret that the establishment doesn't want us to know.

One of my mentees, is an alternative pain therapist called Lyn. Lyn has cured people in ONE session after they have been in pain for 30 years!

How is that possible?

Because Lyn knows that pain is an unreliable message. If you put your hand in a fire, then you feel immediate pain. This is a very useful message to let you know about the tissue damage in your hand.


What happens if 3 months later you still feel that acute pain every time you see a fire.

The pain you feel is real, but there is no tissue damage. The pain has become a nuisance message.

Lyn works with the unconscious mind to remove this unwanted and unnecessary message.

This is powerful stuff that can immediately improve people’s lives. The problem is that most people (myself included) do not know that pain can be an unreliable message.

To educate people on this fact, Lyn ran some Facebook ads where she revealed the 6 Myths of Chronic Pain.

Her ad had a relevance score of 10 out of 10. The click through rate was 7.65%.

Because Lyn gave great value within her ad (and also told her story) the ad got a lot of Likes and Shares.

So, if you can break down some well-established myths in your ad then do it.


Because you are proving that you can help people, by actually helping them, in your ad.

When you’ve got an ad that gives great value and gets a lot of Likes and Shares then Facebook will reduce the cost of showing your ads because you are giving their users a good experience.

There’s one final point that I’d like to address…


How Long Should Your Ad Copy Be?

I know there will be people reading this thinking, how much copy will people read in a Facebook ad?

You might like the idea of writing an inspirational personal story in your ad or busting 6 myths and are concerned about the length of your ad copy.

So, here’s a useful rule of thumb:

Facebook ad copy should be like a mini skirt. It should be long enough to cover the essentials and short enough to keep it interesting!

I know, that’s not much of a rule of thumb. It certainly doesn’t tell you what is too much copy.

Here’s the truth…

If your copy is interesting, and gives your prospect a front row seat to a better life, then there is no such thing as too much copy!

I’ve written ads that are over 1,000 words that have produced great results. I’ve written ads that are over 1,500 words that have produced great results.

Not everyone is going to read that much copy. Equally not everyone is going to want to work with you.

Your ad copy finds the people that want to work with you and filters out the rest.

So, don’t be afraid to write long copy ads.

The only thing to be afraid of is writing boring ads. You can’t bore someone into downloading your ebook or registering for your webinar. You can inspire them to do these things.

Be your worst critic before you publish your ads. Write your ad copy. Then give yourself at least a day before you re-read it. Getting cold on your copy (the time between when you write it and when you read it) will make it easier for you to see the faults in your work.

When I’ve just written something, chances are I’m going to think every word is gold. If I re-read the copy 24 hours later, I’ll see some flaws in it. If I re-read the copy several days later, I’ll see more flaws in it.

What’s the moral of the story?

If you can be ruthless with your editing, then you can write great copy.

If you can be ruthless with your editing, then you can write engaging and inspiring copy that motivates people to take the next step.


Now It’s Your Turn

To write a high performing Facebook ad you need to write an inspirational personal story in a conversational way. The way I do that is to imagine that I’m sat in a coffee shop and the couple sitting next to me are discussing the exact problem that I can solve. How do I interrupt their conversation and make them want to listen to what I have to say?

That’s the question I ask myself before I sit down to write. That’s the question that I ask myself when editing.

So, get clear on the story that you would tell. What are the struggles that you went through on your journey of discovery?

Once you know that, you’ve got your body copy sorted.

Then think about how you would interrupt the couple sitting next to you in the coffee shop. That will give you, your 2 headlines.

If this has helped you see how you can improve your Facebooks ads, then please leave a comment below.

If this has made you see how you can use Facebook ads to bring new qualified leads into your business on a daily basis, then please leave a comment below.

If you know a business owner or service provider that is great at what they do and struggles to make a living, then please share this post with them.

Until next time…

Carpe diem

Roland Eva


P.S. if you'd like to build your dream business then you need a proven system to find your ideal customer, earn their trust, and make them feel good about buying.

After many, many failures, I’ve created a simple 5-step system to find people that need your help, to earn their trust, and to make them feel good about buying. This system made me £672,989 in just 9 days!

I’d like to give you a free ebook that reveals: how to use the simple 5-step system that made me £672,989 in just 9 days!

To download your free copy just click the link below:

Here’s Just A Taste Of What’s Inside:

  • How to find your ideal customer– those that desperately need your help and can pay for it.
  • How to test your business idea for FREE! And how to scale fast with the proof of market demand.
  • How to sell products and services at any price (£5 to £12,000) in any market without a sales team!
  • How to make yourself unique… even in a crowded market… so you never compete on price… and easily attract your ideal customer like bees to honey!
  • Remove the confusion, fear, and doubt about turning your idea into a profitable business by following a proven 5-step system that made me £672,989 in just 9 days!


To download your free copy just click the link below:

About The Author

I’m a copywriter and business growth trainer, mentor and consultant.

For the last 5 years, I’ve helped authors, coaches, mentors, consultants, software developer and health professionals to sell products and services in industries as diverse as property, technology, finance, personal development, business opportunity, weight loss, and alternative health.

These products and services have ranged in price from £5 to £12,000. My most successful campaign made £672,989 in just 9 days. I took that result and transformed it into a simple repeatable system. A system that I teach to ambitious entrepreneurs that want to make money on demand without a sales team.

Why do I want to help other business owners? Because my marketing journey began when I lost my first business, a photography and graphic design studio. The pain of watching my business slowly die, and being powerless to do anything about it, motivated me to discover how promotional messages can make money on demand without a sales team.

Today my mission is to prevent every business owner from suffering through the same pain as I did. I’d like to take entrepreneurs on the joy ride that comes with having a proven system to make money on demand and to relax with the security of knowing where your next sale is coming from.

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